Parental Persistence

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originally uploaded by mikebaird

We have a culture of pushover parenting.  Don't believe me?  Look in the supermarket, where three-year-olds are often given treats to keep them from misbehaving.  Look at exhausted parents eyes, which have so many lines under them because Junior kept them up half the night tossing and turning in Mom and Dad's bed.  And look at the parenting magazines, which tell us that we must, at all costs, preserve our child's self esteem, even if he's a spoiled brat.  Everywhere we look, parents are trying to be their kid's friends.

Maybe we've forgotten that when becoming a parent means that we are responsible.  We are the authority.  That little baby came into the world without a clue how to fall asleep in his own bed, or obey Mom's "don't touch," or be kind.  He won't learn those things if someone doesn't teach him.



So let me encourage you, along with Betsy Hard, author of It Takes a Parent, to take those reigns of authority that come with the title 'Mom' or 'Dad.'  Put your baby to sleep in his own crib and don't get him up at the first protest tears.  Tell your toddler to pick up his toys, and follow through with a punishment if he doesn't.  Come up with some chores for your preschooler (make sure you teach him how to do them).  Don't let your grade schooler go to that party if his room isn't clean.  Require your teen to pay for gas in the car he uses.  Be the parent.  Teach responsibility.

I don't think there are any perfect parents out there, but lets be parents for our kids rather than friends.  Lets persevere even when the results aren't immediate and the culture is encouraging us to give up.  Babywise II says that a 1-year old is really only capable of obeying about 60% of the time when parents begin obedience training.  To get better results we'll need persistence throughout childhood.  Parenting is hard work.  It's filled with joy and love, but hard work nonetheless.  The more we accept the mantle of responsibility that comes with parenthood, the more we'll be able to enjoy our well behaved, kind hearted children.

RESOURCES
It Takes a Parent
Babywise II