Esteeming Ourselves Too Much?

Creative Commons
originally uploaded by Boocal

Our society is drenched in self-esteem. The generation that is now young adults is even called "Generation Me." We give our kids medals simply for participating. Perhaps we've gone a bit too far.

Would you prefer a next-door neighbor with high self esteem or one who is humble and modest? How about an employer with high self esteem or one who is humble and modest? How about a spouse with high self esteem or one who is humble and modest? Perhaps our kids would fare better in the world if we taught them humility and modesty.



"Generation Me" unfortunately isn't faring all that well in the adult world. Many of them expect to have their parents' living standard without having to work for it. Enter the soaring credit card debt that is weakening our economy and society.

Our children are the future. If we are to change our decadent and deteriorating society, we'll need kids (and parents) who value hard work, maturity, and humility.  How can we get there?  Focusing our praise on moral victory is a good way to start.  Here are some of the ways I praise my 9 month old's budding morality:

"Good job being patient while Mommy clips your fingernails."
"I like how you're keeping your hands out of your mouth while Mommy feeds you."
"Thank you for obeying me and staying away from the computer cord."
"Good job playing by yourself for a bit."
"I liked your self control being quiet in Church."

Of course, he doesn't just develop self control on his own.  I also have to tell him "Keep your hands out of your mouth" and "Shh.  We're in Church." quite a bit.  I like to catch him in his moral victories, though.  As he grows in maturity, self control, patience, and obedience, I look forward to many more ways to praise.  This will teach him to esteem the good in himself but to overcome the bad.

RESOURCES
Raising Unselfish Children in a Self-Absorbed World